I have always believed that the heart and soul of the 23rd Psalm is found in the fourth verse—“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for you are with me; your rod and your staff—they comfort me.” Everything prior builds up to these words, and everything that follows flows out from them.

In fact, if you pay close attention to the pronouns, there is a remarkable shift here. In the first three verses, God is referred to in the third person—“He makes me lie down in green pastures … He leads me beside still waters … He restores my soul.” But beginning in verse four, God is referred to in the second person—“I will fear no evil, for You are with me.”

Notice that the psalmist does not claim that we will fear no evil because there is no such thing as evil. Nor does he suggest that evil will only befall the wicked. Clearly, evil exists in the world, and good people are as vulnerable to it as bad people. The reason the psalmist is unafraid is because he knows that, as he walks through this dark valley, he is not alone!

Several years ago, a psychology professor at a major university conducted an experiment in pain tolerance. He invited students to measure how long they could keep a bare foot immersed in a bucket of ice water. One of the things he discovered is that if someone else was in the room, the students were able to keep their foot in the bucket nearly twice as long. Somehow the pain was not quite as painful when another person was there.

We all know people who have experienced great tragedies, and sometimes we wonder if there is anything we can do for them. In my experience, the best thing you can do is simply be with this other person. You do not need to explain their suffering, or justify it as part of God’s eternal plan. You do not need to help them see “the bright side,” or try to make them feel better by pointing out that there are others who have had it a whole lot worse.

Simply being there, silently holding the other person’s hand, is what helps most, because it is always easier to face a troubling present, and an uncertain future, when you know that you are not facing it alone. “I will fear no evil,” writes the psalmist, “for You are with me.”

God never promised to eliminate all of the dark valleys from our lives. God never promised to construct a detour around them, or to airlift us out of them. What God promises is that, when we walk through those dark valleys, we will not be alone!