Forgiveness is not only an extremely difficult thing to do; I would maintain that, if we are trying to do it all by ourselves, it is pretty near impossible. Jesus once told his disciples, “If a brother or sister wrongs you 490 times in a row, and each time returns and says, ‘I am so sorry,’ you must forgive him or her.”

But have you ever actually tried to do that? It ain’t easy, let me tell you. Even in those times when I have finally worked up the courage to stammer out the words, “I forgive you,” my heart has often remained angry and resentful. Secretly, I have still desired the satisfaction of the other telling me that I was right all along … I still wanted the other to make it up to me somehow, rather than merely saying, “Sorry about that” … I still sought some kind of praise in return—if only the praise of being so magnanimous!

I guess that just goes to show you how much my forgiveness pales in comparison to God’s because God’s forgiveness is unconditional. It is not determined by how profoundly, or profusely, we apologize. It is not determined by our past record of performance, or by the fact that this particular sin represents a “first time offense.” There’s nothing in the Bible which indicates that God grades on the curve!

Some have argued that God cannot forgive us unless (a) we acknowledge our wrongdoing, and (b) we repent of it. But frankly, I’ve never bought into that notion. If God cannot reach out to us until we first reach out to God, then that puts us in the driver’s seat. We are the ones calling the shots—and when it comes to forgiveness, that’s just not the case. God always makes the first move.

In order for God’s forgiveness to be truly unconditional, it cannot be determined by the sinner or by the sin. It doesn’t matter if we have committed a “heavyweight” sin, or a “lightweight” sin, or a “welterweight” sin. It doesn’t matter if we meant well but inadvertently messed things up, or whether we clearly knew better but decided to do it anyway. God will continue to forgive us simply because it is God’s nature to be forgiving.

The well-known petition from the Lord’s Prayer—“Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors”—is frequently interpreted to mean that God can only forgive us to the extent, or to the same degree, that we forgive others. But, once again, that puts us in control—and we’re not. Never have been, never will be.

I would like to suggest that what Jesus is really saying is, “First, receive God’s forgiveness—unconditionally and unilaterally—and then allow that same forgiveness to flow through you and be shared with others.” In other words, just as you have been forgiven … forgive those around you!